Thoughts from a 4-Year-Old

Abigail: Mommy, are God's hands big?

Stephanie: I'm not sure, Abigail. I've never seen His hands, but I suppose we'll find out one day.

Abigail: I'm pretty sure they're really big because we all live in God's hands.

Seven Years...

Today marks the day of our wedding seven years ago. Time flies when you're having fun but, there have been times that weren't so much fun, going back even more than seven years ago.

Eight years ago Daniel was stationed in Charleston, SC, and I was living in Odessa, TX, working and going to school. We were in love and not enjoying the long-distance relationship situation, and discussing marriage quite often. As he was planning to come home for Christmas, I was secretly hoping he was bringing a ring with him. Knowing that he's not much on keeping secrets or planning surprises, I asked him daily what he was getting me for Christmas. And, he always replied that he had gotten me some red shoes. I was sure that was a joke to avoid the discussion...

Once he arrived, I was so excited to see him that I drove to Dallas (more than 5 hours away) to meet him at the airport even though his sister lived in Dallas and was planning to pick him up and deliver him to Odessa. The next day we made the trek to Odessa, with the "red shoes" comment coming back up several times. 

We spent Christmas Day with my family and headed out to New Mexico that night to join Daniel's family for skiing and visiting at his grandparents' mountain home. But first, we made a pit-stop at his parent's home to exchange gifts amongst ourselves. I was shocked to open the only box there was for me and see a pair of the ugliest red sandles I'd ever seen. Not wanting to look up, I just kept staring at the shoes trying to decide if this was a joke or if he actually thought it was a good gift. Did I need to put on my "you're not going to fool me"or "aww.... how sweet" look? I pulled one of the shoes out, only to see that there was more in the bottom of the box. Yes!... Oh, wait. It's a book... Wait for it.... IT WAS WEDDINGS FOR DUMMIES. I looked up, and Daniel was down on one knees with a ring box open in his hand. 

Looking back, I think he deserved more ridicule than I dished out for his humorous "romantic" notions. Really, do I look like a dummy? I think any bridal magazine would have served the same purpose. But, his plan had been well-orchestrated. He later revealed that he had purchased the ring several months before the proposal and spent months praying and contemplating the decision. (I think it's worked out well so far.)

So, engaged, in love and on cloud 9, we jumped in the car and headed towards New Mexico. (Although we weren't married yet, we were already suffering through the "who's family do we spend this holiday with" and "did we split up our time evenly" issues.) The five-hour drive to Ruidoso started off well but hit a snag about 45 minutes into the trip. The weather worsened severely, and our speed crawled to a snail's pace as cars were going off the road left and right due to icy conditions. Not far over the Texas border, the DPS put us out of our misery (or so I thought) and closed the road. We ended up in a small town (or what I'd rather call an intersection of two country roads with a few businesses that cater to oilfield workers), Tatum, and snagged the last vacant room in the only motel (not a hotel or even an inn). 

Thinking we had lucked out, we got into our room and learned that we might have been better off sticking it out in the car or turning around and heading back to the last town. The only thing to eat was a fried bean burrito from the Town & Country. The door to the room didn't meet the ground, and snow was blowing into the room from outside. The room was supposed to be heated via a small gas furnace that I was sure was not safe for anyone. And, to top if off, it was Christmas Day, for pete's sake. This was the first day of the rest of our life together, and Christmas, and we were in this roach motel with snow blowing in under the door! I was sure this was a bad omen, or at least a sign from God, and not a good one. 

We decided to just try and get some sleep and hope the roads would be open in the morning. When the lights turned off, my horror grew as I learned that the so-called cute flannel pajamas I had purchased for the mountain trip were actually glow-in-the-dark. I was aglow with sheep jumping from head to toe! The sheep were the final straw, and I could no longer hold it in. I ended up crying myself to sleep that Christmas night.

The next morning, the car was completely frozen shut. Even the doors would not open due to the thick layer of ice. If there had been an ice scraper stowed in my car, we couldn't have gotten to it. But, I wasn't that prepared anyways. (Needless to say, since that trip I've had an ice scraper in every car I've owned.) We used a razor blade cartridge to gradually chip and scrape the ice from the car. We weren't in much of a hurry because the roads weren't open yet. By the time we were able to pry the doors open and see through the windshield, we headed to the roadblock and joined the others already waiting. Showing our maturity, we threw snowballs at the roadblock sign to pass the time.

Eventually, the road opened and we were able to slowly make our way through the rest of the trip. Seven hours later, we happily arrived and ended the worst roadtrip we had ever taken (up until then, but that's another story). 

December 27, 2000 

Fortunately, I didn't let the glowing sheep, hazardous furnace, snow or ice talk me out of the engagement. Almost a year later, we sealed the deal, and have been happily married since. 

Although I do still own them, I've never slept in the sheep pajamas again. And, I've never worn them, but I also still have the ugly red shoes, but I still have the ring and wear it gladly.

November 10, 2001

A Conversation From Today...

Abigail: What is that?

Stephanie: I don't know.

Abigail: Do you remember the other day when you told me that you're smarter than me, and mommies know everything? 

Stephanie: Uhhhhh.....

Abigail: Well, obviously you don't know everything.

Pumpkins & Corn Husks & Gourds, Oh My!

I've never decorated for any season other than Christmas, but was inspired by a variety of pumpkins being sold at the grocery store to take a stab at fall decor this year. I'm not anywhere near crafty, so this was my first attempt at gathering items and assembling decor such as centerpieces and a mantlepiece. It was fun, and I'm certainly enjoying the finished product, especially the apple-orange scented twigs added to each piece. Between the scented candles and twigs, the house smells wonderful!

The front yard,

...the front door,

... and the dining table in the kitchen,

... and the dining table in the dining room,

... and the fireplace mantle in the living room.

Fancy Nancy

Abigail's class focused on classic stores such as Goldilocks & the Three Bears for the month of October. They read, performed and put on puppet shows to tell their favorite stories. As part of the unit, the class had Storybook Character day a few weeks ago when the children dressed as their favorite characters, parents joined them for a picnic breakfast, and they paraded through the kindergarten classes displaying their costumes.

Abigail chose a modern character, Fancy Nancy. If you don't have a little girl, you're probably not familiar with this dolled up young lady, but she's quite the character, and a perfect match for my little girl. We've collected a few of this series' books and always enjoy reading them.

Nancy is the daughter of two plainly dressed parents usually seen in jeans and t-shirts, but never shows herself in anything less than party dresses, full jewelry and curled hair. Not only does she assume the appearance of "Fancy Nancy," but chooses her vocabulary similarly. In narration and when speaking to others, she uses the most multi-syllable words she can think of, then defines them by explaining what word is a less fancy version.

Abigail donned a silk shantung pink dress with a tulle petticoat, slept in sponge rollers for the curled hair, added her best tiara and bracelets, and headed to school. She was fully into character as she greeted her teacher dressed in a Snow White dress, saying "That's a gorgeous dress, Mrs. Borman. That's a fancy word for pretty." Oh, Abigail.

Then, I met her for breakfast a bit later, bringing only the fanciest of take-out breakfasts, Starbucks.

She loved the Starbucks, but I was not impressed. Apparantly, the found the fanciest cow in the pasture to milk, because the price of a cup of milk was certainly the fanciest! I digress...

The kids then lined up for their costume parade and made the rounds through the kindergarten classes.

And, Abigail has stayed in Fancy Nancy mode ever since. She chooses her words carefully and is constantly inquiring about "fancy" words.

"Mom, do you know what a fancy word is for broken? Damaged."

"Mom, that sky is spectacular. That's a fancy word for beautiful."

:Mom, I'm exhausted. That's a fancy word for tired."

Mom, mom, mom, fancy, fancy, fancy... I think you get my point.

Movie Night

Anyone who knows our family very well, knows that we don't celebrate Halloween. The origins of the event are enough to make us find something else to do. Here's a brief synopsis of the "holiday": It began as a festival when Celtic pagans would take stock of their supplies and slaughter livestock for winter stores.  The ancient Gaels believed that on October 31 the boundary between the living and the deceased dissolved, and the dead became dangerous for the living by causing problems such as sickness or damaged crops.  The festivals would frequently involve bonfires, into which bones of slaughtered livestock were thrown.  Costumes and masks were also worn at the festivals in an attempt to mimic the evil spirits or placate them. 

So, there you have it. It's not something either Daniel or myself are interested in encouraging the kids to partake of. I know, I know. You don't have to give me the speech about it just being kids dressing up in cute costimes and getting lots of free candy. In my opinion, I truly believe that Satan must get even a tiny bit excited about having so many people join in an event which comes from evil origins. You don't have to agree with me, but we're very set in our Halloween avoidance ways. We don't even attend the church events. They call them safe alternatives to Halloween, but why are they called alternatives when it's the same darn thing! Kids are dressed up in costumes and getting candy on October 31! Just because it's in a church doesn't mean it's an alternative. It's just a scenery change. 

On top of that, why would I tell my kids that ghosts, spiders, witches and running around in the dark are things to be celebrated? No thanks, we can find something better to do with our time.

Abigail is fully aware of what Halloween is for other children and doesn't mind letting them know that she doesn't dress up or trick or treat. She certainly didn't mind when I told her that we would find something fun to do instead of Halloween. Daniel was working, so the kids picked out a new movie for our home collection and we hosted our own movie night.

Plenty of fun was had hanging out together in our comfy pajamas and watching Madagascar. It was so good, we watched it again on Saturday! I'll take an evening of snuggling with my babies and watching animated animals sing show tunes over Halloween any day.

Praise God From Whom All Blessings Flow

I'm back! It's not that I actually went anywhere, but I've been mostly absent from the blog for the month of October. Hosting four rounds of company in one month took almost all the spare time in the Hardy home. Needless to say, we are happy to send October packing and usher in the new month of November.

This time of year is our favorite at the Hardy house, as we celebrate this season of thanks. We've hosted a large meal for many friends (and a few times family) when we've often run out of room at two tables and had friends feasting around a coffee table. It's been cramped (in our 1-bedroom apartment in San Diego), tropical and crowded in our duplex in Pearl Harbor and cold and rainy in Charleston. No matter what, there has always been a large meal and invitations set forth to everyone we knew. A few times, we've been privileged to host family at this time, but most Thanksgivings at our home have been filled with co-workers with their families and neighbors. No matter who the guests have been, we've always focused on the reason for the season and celebrated God's blessings.

Now that our children are growing up, we want to pass this on to them. We have a book, gifted to us last year by my mother, that we've already brought out for nightly readings. I pray that Abigail and Cooper both grow up learning about God's blessings for us, and this is a perfect time to focus on that. Throughout this month, we will record a reason to be thankful each day. At the end of the week, Abigail will tell us something she is most thankful for, and we will collect those items until December.

After focusing on the blessings God's given us, in December we will begin focusing on the greatest blessing of all, Christ, and teach our children of the love God showed us by sending us His son. We'll find some charities for Abigail to donate the items she collected during November, and hopefully begin teaching her to show God's love to others. We never want Christmas to be about Santa Claus or anything commercial, and we'll look every year for a way to focus on giving, as God gave to us, which is our greatest blessing we are thankful for. Until then, we'll keep focusing on giving thanks.

I hope you'll also not make this month about turkey and pies, but about giving thanks and praise. If not because I've asked you to, but because a man much wiser than I am, declared it. It was 1863 when President Abraham Lincoln set aside the last Thursday of November as a day of national "Thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens." Surely we can spare a month out of the year, and not just a day, to focus solely on God's blessings.